Someone who truly wants to get to know you will take the time to write a personalized message responding to specific items in your profile, not send a generic cut-and-paste letter saying, “Hey girl, I saw your profile and was intrigued …” Think about the hundreds of other people who’ve gotten the same letter, and decide whether you’re willing to accept only the barest minimum of effort.Maggie from New York City specified in her profile that she wanted to meet someone between the ages of twenty-five and thirty-five who lived in Manhattan, so receiving emails from sixty-five-year-old men who lived a hundred miles away was not amusing.

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I exchanged phone numbers with a guy, and when he called me to set up a date, he was drunk,” says Lindsay.

“I should’ve taken that as a sign, but I figured it was Friday night, so I shouldn’t judge.

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People who employ this tactic generally aren’t tender souls who are afraid of rejection; they’re just not confident enough to be themselves.

Some brazen daters even post contradictory information right on their profile (“I’m really forty, even though I listed my age as thirty-five”), as justification for trying to show up in more searches for “men over six feet tall,” or “women under forty.” Presenting oneself in the best light is one thing, but outright lying is quite another.For a fun, safe and uniquely Chinese dating experience, join free today.When we meet a potential love interest in person, we’re taught to look for certain red flags—like being rude to the waiter, calling incessantly or not at all, or claiming that his favorite book is The Da Vinci Code.Someone who blatantly disregards what you’ve stated you’re looking for is simply wasting your time.If that didn’t turn her off, then the subsequent emails from the same men asking why she was an ageist definitely did.If you receive an impersonal message that seems oddly like a form letter, it probably is.